Quick summary:
An entire football team is lost. Will we ever find them? Will they ever find themselves?
That escalated quickly. First it was 7-0. Then 14-0. Then 21-0. Then 28-0. And so on. Finally, the Colts scored a meaningless touchdown to make it 42-7.
Drop it like it's Allen. Dwayne Allen. What the heck? He wasn't the only one, of course. No one could catch the ball.
Let's gamble! Perhaps the Colts coaching staff foresaw the calamity that was about to befall the football team. Perhaps Pat McAfee foresaw it. Either way, the decision to run a fake punt on their own 19-yard line didn't pay off. Dewey McDonald--of course his name is Dewey--couldn't catch the ball despite being Coby Fleener wide open. The dropped pass turned into an immediate touchdown, and the game was over. We just had to slog through three more quarters of it.
Taunting! Next time you lay a guy out and decide it's time to stand over him in intimidating fashion and yell something about his mother, don't do it. I don't think the Colts would've magically won this game if Jerrell Freeman's penalty hadn't happened and the Cowboys had to punt, but I'll always wonder.
Greg in-Tolerable. He had a rough game, didn't he? Yikes. Of course, no one had a good game, so...
Matt Hasselbeck had more yards than Andrew Luck. Think about that for a second. At least the coaching staff decided to pull Luck. There was no reason for him to be in the game because the Colts weren't coming back.
How bad was the game? Brandon Weeden threw a 43-yard touchdown pass. Think about that.
But it was an important one yard. The Colts carried ten times for one total yard. Boom Herron carried seven times for three yards, Trent Richardson carried twice for one yard, and Zurlon Tipton carried one time for minus-three yards. Glad Indy really got the ground game going this week.
So, why is he still in the game? You can direct this one at DeMarco Murray, Reggie Wayne, Tony Romo, and any other player who's been hurt and had no business being in a lopsided game. I know Murray is Dallas' bell cow, but the guy had hand surgery this week and still carried 22 times. I'm not upset that Dallas kept in the "A" team for a long time...but I'd be livid if I were a Cowboys fan. This was a perfect opportunity to let him rest up for the entire half and let the other guys get the carries.
Mysteries of the Offensive Line. So, Khaled Holmes played center. Everyone saw that coming, right? And then Xavier Nixon was in for the injured Gosder Cherilous and was absolutely awful. Jonotthan Harrison was active but didn't play on the o-line. Same thing with A.Q. Shipley. Your starting group: Anthony Castonzo at LT, Jack Mewhort at LG, Khaled Holmes at C, Lance Louis at RG, and Xavier Nixon at RT. It wasn't good. This was the ninth different starting line for the Colts this season. Consistency!
"It was bad. A lot of bad. Not much good, if any." That's Andrew Luck after the game. I considered just posting a GIF of the Death Star exploding instead of writing a full post this week. I'll let that supplement my ramblings instead:
Remember in like Week 6 when everybody said the Cowboys were like the best team in the NFL? The Colts must've remembered, because they certainly played like they were afraid of them.
More Jack Doyle! Seriously. Give me more! Just...don't let him catch a pass in the endzone because he'll drop it.
Josh Cribbs on offense. So, that happened late in the game. Maybe he should've replaced Reggie Wayne earlier? Just a thought.
The Colts have beaten three teams with winning records! The Bengals, the Ravens, and...the Texans. They've lost (mostly in lopsided fashion) to any good team they've played, and have been outscored in their last three losses (Pittsburgh, New England, and Dallas) by a combined margin of 135-61. Your AFC South Champions are poised for a deep postseason run, everyone!
